A little perspective...

Major blowup at the family last night. Sometimes it feels like no one takes me seriously around here; sometimes, like no one appreciates my efforts.

You may be thinking: Now wait a minute. What about that incredible date-night at home?

But could you just excuse me for a minute while I wallow in my own humanity?

Depleted frozen waffles were involved.

Along with one child's comment, "You treat me like crap!"

As I made muffins for said child.

Instead of reading the novel to which I am currently addicted, with a hot beverage in hand.

Both of our children are now in school, and we are all still adapting to the altered dynamics and increased responsibilities. But this comment pushed me over the edge.

Have they already forgotten all of the park and library trips? the bandaged boo-boos? the food and snacks prepared? hotwheels and train-tracks? hide-and-seek? polly pockets and puppy pretend? Really?

And so, indignant and seething, I lashed out, words and kitchen pans clashing.

If I, in all my sinfulness and failures, could react so strongly over feeling forgotten and unappreciated... imagine Holy, Perfect Abba's true entitlement:

"...in the desert....you saw how the Lord your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place. In spite of this, you did not trust in the Lord your God.... He was angry...." ~Deuteronomy 1:31-32

Entitlement?

I am a sinner, married to a sinner, raising two little sinners in a sinful world. The same judgment rests on each of us. And, thank God, the same grace covers each of us through the blood of Christ Jesus.

Unholy temper tantrums?

I can't bank on others remembering my past acts of kindness. Nor am I guaranteed an opportunity tomorrow to compensate for indulging my anger today.

Each of us has right now, this moment, to love those around us.

I need to remember all the ways the Lord my God has carried me, through both deserts and lush pasturelands, to this place.

I need to trust in the Lord my God.